Mom, I'm Not a Lesbian

There's nothing wrong with being a full-time lesbian, except liking girls.

I had a very comforting chat with one of my best friends yesterday, in which he shared to me why he wishes he were gay, though he is tragically still attracted to the female form:

"Girls are so dramatic, all the time. They think that physical loyalty is symbolic of, rather than devoid of emotional loyalty-- this one chick stopped having sex with me because she thinks that being emotionally involved with her ideal non-boyfriend is less important than me hooking up with some chick at a party."

To be fair, I tend to agree. I'm really glad I'm not physically attracted to girls, because if my girlfriend didn't understand that being emotionally attached is far more important than getting some while drunk at a party, it'd be all over. And guys usually don't think about it that way, if at all. So it's not an issue. (of course, I've been single long enough to have forgotten about what boyfriends think during relationships, but that's neither here nor there).

So I don't like girls. Big deal. I mean, I don't hate anyone singularly (it's a very hippie douche thing), I just hate everyone. Equally.

There have to be rules for there to be exceptions, and I just happen to call the exceptions my friends.